How to avoid awkward conversations at work

职场沟通有学问:比如,同事体臭怎么办?
时间:2018-10-13 单词数:4270

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导读:BBC记者Alison Green十多年来一直为读者提供职场建议。她发现,很多人遇到问题会避免与同事进行沟通。在本文中,她提供了一些职场沟通小建议。

职场怎么沟通_英语新闻

For the last 11 years, I’ve written a workplace advice column, answering people’s letters on everything from how to tell a manager your workload is too high to what to do about a colleague who smells.

在过去的11年里,我开了一个有关工作的建议专栏,回答人们诸如“如何告诉老板你的工作量太大”或“同事体臭难闻怎么办”等问题。

One of the biggest themes I’ve seen in my mail in that time is that a lot of people want to know – how do I get my boss or my colleague to change their behavior without me actually having to talk to them about it? In other words, an awful lot of us are hoping that there will be some sort of magical spell that will let us solve problems without ever having to use our words. People really want to avoid direct conversations, especially if there’s any potential for awkwardness.

在那段时间里,我邮件的一大主题是,很多人想知道,如何在不用开口的情况下改变老板或同事的行为?换句话说,我们中的很多人都希望学会某种神奇的咒语,不必说话就能解决问题。大家都想避免直接沟通,特别是当沟通有可能变得尴尬的时候。

For example, I’ve heard from people who stew in silence for months rather than asking a colleague to please stop taking all their calls on speakerphone, or to turn down a loud cellphone ring. I’ve heard from people who spend way too long tolerating physically uncomfortable working conditions – like a painful chair or an air freshener that literally nauseates them – rather than have a quick conversation with the person who could fix it. And even managers, who have the clear authority to speak up when they want something to change, can be some of the worst offenders when it comes to shying away from direct conversation.

例如,我听说过,有些人可以宁愿闷闷不乐几个月,也不会要求同事接电话的时候不要开免提,或将他们的刺耳手机铃声调小。我也听说过,有些人长时间忍受不舒服的工作环境,比如椅子不好或室内充满恶心难闻的空气清新剂,但他们不找人沟通解决这些问题。即使是拥有一些权利的管理者,他们想要改变某些事情,也会回避直接与下属沟通,这种逃避是大错特错的。

While certainly no one looks forward to a conversation that might be awkward or uncomfortable, the reality is that you’ll get far better results in your professional life – and usually have far better quality of life at work – if you’re willing to speak up and ask for what you want. Of course, that doesn’t mean speaking up in an aggressive or adversarial way, which seems to be what people sometimes imagine they’d have to do. Instead, the idea is to speak up calmly and matter-of-factly – in a tone similar to the one that you’d use to say “I can’t seem to get this software to work” or “could you help me solve this problem with a client?”

虽然没有人喜欢尴尬或不舒服的谈话,但实际上,如果你愿意主动沟通、提出要求,那么你将在职场中表现得更好,这意味着工作质量也会更高。当然,这并不是说以攻击性或对抗性的方式沟通,虽然有些人认为要解决问题就必须这么怼着来。相反,你的想法应该用冷静而且就事论事的方式说出来,比如“我好像不会用这个软件来工作”或“和客户的这个问题,能请你帮我解决吗”这样的语气。

If you do that, you’re likely to find that most people are reasonable. Most people want to know if they’re doing something that’s aggravating you or making you unhappy – or in the case of that air freshener, making you physically ill. Most people won’t be upset that you initiated a calm, polite conversation about what you need, and you’re not going to come across as a jerk to reasonable people.

如果你主动沟通,你会发现大多数人都能够理解你。大多数人都想知道他们做的某些事是不是让到你生气了,例如在空气清新剂这个例子中,是不是那个空气清新剂让你身体难受了。如果你冷静、礼貌地和他们沟通,大多数理智的人都不会生气的反驳你,更不会觉得你是个讨厌鬼。

来源:BBC爱语吧作者:Sylvia

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